Daily Kvetch

Cougar's Delight

Part of B's birthday present for me was he bought tickets for Pam and I to go see the new Twilight movie, New Moon.  She was the perfect person to go to see this movie with because we both approach the series from the same way, we love it but we also love to mock it.  We don't take it seriously in the least bit.  That said, we both wanted to see the movie and be able to talk about it and not just say, defend it from a husband who thinks the whole thing is stupid.

So there we went and we got some Indian food first and had a grand old time.

Warning:  the rest of this post is about the movie so don't read if say, you could care less. :-)

Twilight:  New Moon opened to a record box office and it isn't just because tweens are going in droves to see it.  The cougars make up a huge percentage of the box office and the showing that we went to was high on cougar, less on the teens.  That meant we only had to move our seats once to avoid the chatty teens behind us so we could concentrate on the stunning dialog shirtless abs.

Seriously, this movie is all about the exploitation of the male body.  It is so refreshing to not have the female characters sexually objectified for a change.  Seriously, this movie was the Playgirl of pop cinema.  Nothing but cougars, sex obsessed but naive tweens, and gay or closeted men.

First off, there is Robert Pattinson as Edward. He was relatively unknown before the first Twilight movie and is now being chased by hoards of horny teens every time he tries to leave his home.  Then there is Taylor Lautner as Jacob.  The actor had to gain 35 pounds of muscle for the role and basically has his shirt off in every scene he is in, which is most of the movie.  Sometimes it is raining.  These are the men who comprise 2/3 of the love triangle in the book series and in the movie so add to the fact that these are the teen beat cover boys of a new generation and you have basically a "boy-toy off" throughout the movie. 

I am sorry to tell you that Taylor Lautner is only 17 years old which makes me a very dirty old lady.  He is, quite simply, scrumptious!  I have never seen a more beautiful man, er boy, on screen in my entire life.  When it was finally time for Pattinson to show his goods, by taking off his shirt to reveal his sparkliness in the sun, it is done like an episode of Baywatch.  Everything becomes slow motion as he strips his shirt off smoldering before stepping into the sun to sparkle. 

It was then that Pam leaned over and said, "Look at his thin scrawny hips and weird nipples."  I had to agree about the nipples.  Seriously, he is no Lautner.

I honestly think they should have renamed this Twilight:  The Beefcake Saga.

Anyway, the movie was stupid as all hell and we laughed at a lot of parts that I think were supposed to be serious but we had a great time and came home and googled info on Lautner where we learned the horrendous truth, that it was quite simply wrong, and potentially a felony, to think of him anything other than a fraternal bond.

Just like this link...

The funny thing is that when I read the series, I was very firmly on the Edward camp but the movies don't play that way at all.  The movies really make Bella's preference for Edward a mystery.  He is kind of cold and removed, controlling, and he doesn't really communicate well with her.  Plus, the scrawny hips?  Jacob is the way to go.  He is sweet, communicative, isn't constantly trying not to kill her, and well....hot!

My review?  Two cougar paws way up!

Meanwhile, enjoy this tidbit I got from Funny or Die, it answers that question of how vampires can date the ladies when aunt flow comes to town.  I tried to embed the video but can't figure out what is going wrong.  Until then, just go to this link to watch it, it is very funny.  The last line slays me.

Well Played Sir, Well Played

So B totally did it.  His surprise was masterful.

He came home from work Friday night with Thai food and then said he had to go and would be back in an hour.  He was gone for at least 3 hours, during which time I got fed up and went to sleep.  He woke me up nudging my leg asking if I wanted to come and see my surprise.  I rolled over and mumbled something and he left the room.  I then heard what sounded like him opening the sofa bed so I stumbled out to find my best friend Pam sitting in the living room.

Pam lives in California, which means she flew cross country all day Friday to spend my birthday and the whole weekend with me!  Plus, I never suspected this because she has two young kids of her own!

Pam is one of my favorite people in the whole universe.  She was my maid of honor at my wedding and my roommate when I first moved to California over a decade ago.  She is my go-to person when I need to talk or need advice, or just want someone to laugh with.  I love her and I miss her and it has sucked being so far away from her that we can't just hang out.

Now I have her for a whole weekend!  Plus, we are going to go see the new Twilight movie tomorrow and be able to make snarky comments while also admiring the hot young stud muffins.

It was great to have her to hang out with and also help entertain the kiddos so B and I could prep for the party.  Speaking of, take a look at my cake!!  It was huge!  It could feed over 50 people I am sure since I had about 25 folks in my house tonight and there is still a lot left.  It was high too - 4 layers!

I am one lucky birthday girl indeed. So far 40 is freaking fantastic!

Thanks B, you are the master of the surprise.  And thanks Pam for traveling so far to spend this time with me.  I love you both!

Blog? What Blog?

I know, I suck at keeping this thing updated recently and no it is not because my life has been that exciting and I just don't have the time to post, more like my life has been rather uneventful and wait, what did TiVo record for me today?

Baby A is going through this insanely annoying stage - all she pretty much does is whine and cry when she is awake.  The thing is she only does this if I a) am not holding her or b) am not in arm's reach.  This means that any time I put her down and walk to say, go to the bathroom or try to do anything other than play with her, she screams bloody murder.  Oh and she has staying power people, she can keep it up a long time until my ears are bleeding and I am huddled in the fetal position.

Seriously, is this a bona fide stage?  One thing about having LM be so delayed as a baby was that he didn't seem to differentiate me from any other person until he was a year old.  I don't really remember him making eye contact or crying when I left him for a few minutes when he was that young.  So is A in a stage other moms have experienced?  When will it end????

I honestly can't seem to get anything done during the days as there is only so much I can do until the incessant screaming and whining gets under my skin.  It doesn't help that she naps only 1x per day and for half an hour at that.  I spoke to her pediatrician about this and she said that since A does sleep 12-13 hours through the night, that she is doing fine.  I hear other moms talk of their babies taking 2 hour naps and I want to strangle them with a wet wipe.

Anyway, so there is the kvetching portion of the post.

In other news....

My 40th birthday is coming up real soon, in less than 48 hours party people!  I saw some other blog folks making some bucket lists on their blogs, things they wanted to do within the year.  It kind of cracked me up since most of these people aren't yet parents so they had these long lists with things like "try new restaurants" and "take a pilates class" and all I could think of was "ah, the leisurely lives of the child free and their relaxed nights at trendy restaurants after a hot stone massage and a 90 minute bikrim yoga class."

I was thinking what my 40th year bucket list would look like and it was a struggle to make it more than:

• Get part time job that pays at least $20/hr (you go girl rocking that Masters Degree!)
• Try to save money for eventual house
• Maybe a night out with a friend once or twice a month (still home and in bed by 11pm missy!)
• Hey, sleep is nice, how about some sleep?
• Ooh, try to make a dinner that doesn't involve the microwave

So I thought and I thought and I thought and I came up with some more that sounds more buckety, in a list kind of way.

• Loose 30 lbs.  I am technically the lowest weight I have been since LM was born but that still is 30 lbs more than where I was when I got pregnant with him...I have lost 10 lbs in the past 3 months so I think I can do it.  I think I can!  I think I can!
• Take at least 3 classes towards my new recession proof occupation
• Decide on what that recession proof occupation will be (leaning towards speech therapy now but it was physical therapy for a while before I decided I just didn't care enough)
• Get at least 2 essays published in real bona fide journals/magazines
• Take vitamins and supplements every day!

I added that last one because while I have been able to work in daily exercise into my life, I can't for the life of me remember to take my vitamins and supplements on a daily basis.  Some habits are hard to make.

So yes, the life of a 40 year old, at least this 40 year old, is very interesting.  I should write a book! (Oh, I think I just might...)

On a totally different subject...

You know how when you buy an online gift certificate, you can write in any name but the email address is what really matters?  Last year B bought me an online gift certificate to my favorite local salon and I went to get a massage and at the end I mentioned that I had the gift certificate and the proprietor looked into my account and didn't see one.  I told her B's name and email and she looked at her computer and then looked up at me and said, "So you must be 'Hot Pants'?"

I called to make an appointment to get my eye brows waxed and she was the one to answer the phone.  When I mentioned my name she said, "Oh Hot Pants!  How have you been doing?"

Clearly I need to reciprocate in kind.

B has been taunting me of late about a super secret birthday surprise.  He is going to be leaving Friday night and had me cancel out on an invitation a friend had extended to have me over for chick flicks.  B is master of the surprise but I am master or ruining surprises.  It is our little cat and mouse game.  He is getting a little better though because now no matter what I guess he says, "Oh you caught me!"

He says when the surprise is revealed I will bow at his feet and say, "Well played, sir, well played."

Time will tell...

The Promised Land

Praise be Hallelujah but was November 12 an eventful day!  B got his formal in writing offer letter from his company and it is good and he will start as an official employee on November 23 and I got the kids vaccinated with their H1N1 shots!

(Insert music - either some classical or maybe Kool and the Gang for the sassiness)

I had about had it to here with not being able to get them shots.  I had so many near misses with free clinics, either finding out about them just too late or after they were over. Then I got word that there was to be a clinic in a town not too far from here this coming Saturday for kids and there was no residency requirement so I was prepping to bring lots of food and entertainment and take the kids bright and early to wait in line.

So today I get 4 frantic calls from my mother - all left on voice mail.  I am terrible at answering the phone.  For starters I can hardly ever find it as I tend to leave it all over the house and then I am usually tending to the kiddos and to add to that, 90% of the calls are spam despite my being on the do not call list.  I tell you this to explain why my mother's voice messages sounded like this:

MEREDITH PICK UP THE PHONE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!!!  I HATE WHEN YOU DON'T PICK UP THE PHONE!  PICK IT UP NOW!  I AM GOING TO CALL YOUR CELL NOW AND YOU BETTER PICK UP THERE OR ELSE!

Luckily I was really out of the house then so didn't get that lovely voice mail until later.  Also because I had both kids with me, I didn't really check my cell phone which was in my coat pocket and set to vibrate so I had an equally screaming message waiting for me there.

My mom had been calling to tell me that there was going to be a h1n1 shot clinic in their town tomorrow and she wanted me to bring the kids.  While she was leaving these messages I was at the pediatrician's office getting them vaccinated.

We were really there because LM was getting his ears checked out.  He had been having problems with fluid in his ears causing him to be a little hard of hearing of late.  Long story short, antibiotics.  But while I was in the waiting room I kept hearing the receptionist calling to tell parents that they finally had some h1n1 vaccinations and making appointments and my blood was boiling as I have been calling them practically every day trying to get them the shots.

So as soon as the doctor came in, I asked about it and without batting an eye he called the nurse to come and get me the forms to sign for both kids and they vaccinated them right then and there.

When I got home I was able to call my parents, who were out, and leave this message:

I GOT THE KIDS VACCINATED TODAY SO STOP CALLING AND SCREAMING INTO MY PHONE!  I LOVE YOU! HAVE A NICE NIGHT!  PROJECT RUNWAY IS ON TONIGHT AND I AM HOPING THAT CAROL HANNAH WINS!

So yes, it is been a really good day.  Yay!

Where I'm At

I know I have been a negligent blogger, if it makes you feel any better, my bedroom still looks like we just moved in and I have 4 loads of laundry all folded waiting to be put away.  I folded them 3 days ago.

On the plus side, my kids are fed, bathed, happy, and asleep and I have gotten to work out pretty much every day, even if I don't get to follow up the heavy sweat with say, a shower.  Why does no one talk about how once you have small kids your ability to take an actual shower is at odds with your increasing need for one?

Anyway, I figured I should give you an update on some stuff going on here in chez Kvetch.  After all the blustering and showing of new director hand, it looks like B's start date as a bona-fide permanent employee with benefits and paid vacation and holiday time off will indeed be November 23, just in time to get paid for two days of holiday time for Thanksgiving.  He got word from both the VP of Human Resources of his new company and the guy who owns the contracting agency that he had been contracting through that this was so.  Of course I won't breathe that sigh of utmost relief until an actual offer letter is signed but this is a very good sign indeed.  There shall be dancing in the street, or at least my living room, and hopefully soon!

Last week was my first full week of stay at home motherdom after giving up the daycare. I have learned that it is almost impossible to get anything done when taking care of a 10 month old.  For starters, I am lucky if I can get her to nap more than 30 minutes and I use this time to work out.  Oh she needs more sleep and will occasionally nap a little in the afternoon but it is not something you can bet your life on although you can bet your life that she will be one cranky little bundle that you will want to toss into a crib and run from come 6pm.

She cries and whines if I am not within reach of her and God forbid I walk out of the room, even if she can see me.  I now have to do mostly everything to a soundtrack of her whining and crying.  Every shower I take is accompanied by screaming.  I like when I blow dry my hair because it drowns out the sound.  Oh bliss.

There is no way I can look for a job and take care of her full time.  I sort of gave that up for a while but there are other things I want to pursue, like writing.  I have been spending some quality at night when I am really tired but before I fall headlong into a stupor time trying to write an essay.  I want to submit an essay for publication in something like Brain Child Magazine.  This is not to say it will happen but a girl can dream can't she?

I finished a decent draft tonight and solicited reviewers from my facebook friends (gotta love status updates as a way to get volunteers) and sent it off.  I must say, I really enjoyed the process of bringing my laptop to the nearby Starbucks after B got home and we had dinner.  I like the ambiance, the music they play, and being alone with my thoughts.  I like feeling like I am using my noggin.

In further other news, I took LM to a fall festival put on by my town's family network program and they had a silent auction going on.  I have issues with auctions in that even though I don't have money and don't really have a need for any new stuff, I find myself wanting things and then putting my name down with a bid.  I bid like $1 over the last bid and figured there would be no way I'd win anything.  I bid on 3 auctions and won 2 of them.

One of the auctions was to have a local cake artist make a special occasion cake.  It came with 2 hand painted party dishes and 4 cheery colored place mats.  I paid $36.  I called the baker today since I figured I could use the cake for my upcoming birthday party.  The agreement said that the cake would feed 10 people and I figured I'd also get a sheet cake to feed the rest of the party guests but the baker said, no, no, no, and said she would make a cake to feed 25 guests free of charge and then sent me to some websites to pick a design.  I picked this one and she said no problem!  Woo!  Totally worth the money.

So that is all the news fit to print this evening.  I am off to the showers before I get dreadlocks.

People Be Funny N Stuff

Tonight I bring you two tales of how people have amused and/or disgusted me this week!

First, the amusement (which is likely disgust for the person involved as you shall see).  One of my friends just had a baby this week, a beautiful bouncing baby boy.  This is their second child and the husband, a roommate of mine from way back in college days, sent out the emailed birth announcement.  The attached pic showed his clearly exhausted but proud wife lying back in the hospital bed holding the just fresh from the oven baby.  The picture had clearly been taken perhaps minutes after the birth but one issue remained, her hospital gown was placed just so that you could see a whole lotta nipple.

Now I am by no means a prude and I don't think she is either but this email went out to pretty much everyone they knew, including elderly family members.  What is more the husband sent the email from the wife's email account and didn't sign his name making it look like she was the one sending out nipple pics of herself.

I am not sure how she reacted to all this but an updated email was sent out today with a pic of the whole family, all clothed, smiling before leaving the hospital.

It reminds me of that Seinfeld episode where Elaine sends a Xmas card out to everyone she knows with a picture on if where she is unknowingly flashing some nipple.  I laughed out loud at the scene where George berates her for not sending him a card and she yells, "You want a card?  You want a card?  Here's your card!" and grabs his head and mushes it in her chest.

The other tale is not so fun loving but amuses me nonetheless.

Since I have become an official stay at home mom I have been looking for things to do with A.  She really lights up when she is around other babies and other people and I discovered an excellent family center in my town with baby play groups for free.  They place is stocked with awesome toys and a bucket to throw toys that have been slobbered on so they can get cleaned.  There is a leader who does about 15 minutes of songs and music and the rest of the hour is just the moms and babies hanging out chatting while the babies interact with each other and toys.

Anyway, since it is free and open to all moms and babies I have met a real cross section of ladies.  As in life, most people you meet are nice and interesting enough but occasionally there is someone you really click with and sometimes there are those who should come with a warning label. 

This week I met the latter.

One of the very first questions that anyone will ask in these groups is the "How old is your baby?" one.  It is a totally fair question, one I too open up with.  Baby A is 10 months old.  She looks 10 months old as she weighs in with a bruising 22 lbs and is pretty tall as well.  She is, however, developmentally delayed in gross motor and perhaps some other areas too as she does not yet wave or clap for example.  She does not crawl, she does not pull to stand, she can roll but sometimes gets stuck.  She can sit for long periods but will fall back and hurt herself if there is no pillow behind her.

So this lady comes in with a 9 month old baby girl who is totally adorable and waving and clapping and smiling up a storm.  We do the chit chat about birthdays and age and names and coo at each other's baby and then she asks if my baby is crawling yet and I told her that she isn't and explained that she has low muscle tone and is getting physical therapy to help her develop those skills.  She looks all horrified and then says in almost whispered tones, "Oh your poor baby!  Is she a cripple?"

Um, yeah.  No.

Clearly girlfriend here is a) a new mom with very little experience with watching other babies develop and b) an idiot.

She also asked me for my contact info so we could hang out.  I gave it to her because I am a sucker but mentioned that with my son's schedule I am pretty busy.  The real reason is that I just don't want to hang out with people who use terms like "a cripple."

So yes, people be funny n' stuff!

Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

Sorry for abandoning the blog for a bit.  It has been one heck of a week and I barely had time to shower let alone try to put coherent thoughts together.

Guess who is still waiting to get H1N1 shots?  My kids!  Over the week I heard time and again from people I know that finally got their kids vaccinated.  I even heard that some healthy adults without babies in the house got vaccinated!  But my high risk asthma kids?  Nooooooway!

Turns out the pediatrician office I go to must have pissed off the vaccine distributors because to date they have only had one drop and used them all up.  They tell me they are expecting another round soon but they cannot guarantee me that my kids will be selected to receive it.  Then I stumbled across a free h1n1 clinic put on by the town this morning for 5-9 year olds!  I literally ran into it thinking it was the place to go vote for the city council members today and I was on a walk with A.  They were closing in 15 minutes which would not give me enough time to walk home, drive and get LM, drive him back and lie through my teeth about his age.  Heck he looks 5 and is almost 5!

Info on this secret 2 hour free clinic for kids apparently went out to parents of kids in the public school but LM is too young for kindergarten so we had no clue.  I called the public health department for the town and was basically told to go to my pediatrician.

The reason I am so hot to get my kids vaccinated is that A's daycare actually got closed down last week because in one day 70% of the kids called out sick with high fevers.  They closed the school for 2 days to do a deep cleaning.  They reopened on Monday, which is when I went in to sign the paperwork to terminate her attendance in daycare and accepted my full time stay at home motherdom with her until 2010.

This decision was also made hot on the heels of B meeting with the HR person at the company he contracts at where they discussed the details of his becoming a permanent employee with benefits.  We were feeling pretty good, the salary was more than we expected, and we wouldn't be bleeding out our savings to pay for health insurance every month.  Sure it would be tight to live off of one salary but at least we'd be covered.

Monday he met with his new manager, a guy that is new to the company.  This guy has stopped the process of B becoming a permanent employee for an unspecified amount of time.  Why?  Because he is the boss and he doesn't want to be tied to decisions made before he came on board.  He said he has heard good things about B's work but figures all the contractors want to become permanent so he wants to wait and see and determine if it would be the best fit.

So shit on us universe.

The good news is that it wasn't like he was fired.  He still works there, just on contract.  The bad news is that we still have to pay health care, he doesn't get any benefits such as paid sick time or holidays and all because the new guy wants to show who has hand.

Sure other stuff has been going on, we had our first ever kids Halloween party (please tell me, is it kid's halloween or kids halloween - I mean the 's shows ownership so I think it is the former but it looks wrong).  It was a spur of the moment decision I had back when fall had begun and the colors on the trees looked so pretty and LM was so excited about Halloween and I was feeling all June Cleevery. 

Original plans had us trying to make a very decorated haunted room and have crafts projects stolen from magazines I looked at.  Of course all of this was way beyond me so instead I got some decorations, stuffed a ghost pinata full of toys and treats, bought a bunch of mini pumpkins and things to decorate them with, and made some orange food colored sugary treats.  Some of the other moms pitched in with homemade goods and really, it was a good 2-3 hours of kid fun.  All the kids, save 2 older boys that my neighbor brought along (she was babysitting) had a good time.  The party poopers, dressed as ninjas, at one point could be heard complaining, "Is this party over yet?"  To which I replied, "You can go at any time!"

Prepping for a party knocks the wind out of me though.  Trying to make the house presentable is just exhausting.  It made me rethink having a birthday party here in a couple weeks that is for sure.

Sorry for the super boring post - I have this to say to daylight savings time....You suck!  I get less sleep, the kids wake up at the same time and all week long I feel like I am hung over.  Makes me almost want to move to Arizona or something.

Swine Flu and Clowns

I don't know what is going on in other parts of the country but here in Massachusetts it is easier to go up to an ATM machine and yell, "Give me Money!" and have it spit $20s at you than it is to get an H1N1 vaccine shot. 

My kids are both higher risk because they have asthma but apparently they didn't rank for the very first limited batch of doses that their doctor's office received.  I was told that the pediatricians are basically ranking the kids as to who gets shots when they arrive.  I called and was basically told they could take our names and put us on an "interested party" list.

A friend of mine is pregnant and she is still waiting for her OBGYN to get some vaccine so she can get a shot.  Until then she is, under doctor's orders, sequestering herself away from gatherings of children.  This means she can't come to my birthday party because about 10 kids will be there.  This of course makes me wonder if I am doing right by my kids having a party, taking them to parties, allowing them out of the house without their protective bubble.

Parenthood is a crap shoot sometimes, you just sometimes have no idea if you are making the right decision and hoping that everything will turn out OK.

So about my looming big day of turning forty....

I decided to have a party.  I suppose it is sort of vain to throw oneself a birthday party but I haven"t had an actual birthday party since, well, since, hmmm?  I think maybe I turned 34?  I can't really recall.  It could be that my brain is too aged to remember but I think the last birthday party I had was when B had all my friends hide at a great somewhat fancy Asian fusion restaurant and then, knowing I had invited them all, pretended they had all canceled at the last minute so when I was all sad and mopey and feeling like an unloved loser, they all came out of a back room and in front of many unsuspecting diners who had no clue who I was I turned to B and said far too loudly, "You son of a bitch!"

Anyway, my party went through quite the evolution.  I think, had I been working and we had some money, I might have had it at some other place like a small room at a restaurant or so and invited everyone I know in the area and have it catered with an open bar and hired a balloon twister for the kids.  For a long while I was going to have it at our smallish apartment and have it catered by a nearby and awesome BBQ place as I do not want to cook.

But then how much does one spend on their own birthday party?  Especially when one is unemployed?  $200?  $300?  $25.67? 

B had a brilliant idea, as per usual.  We started talking about goody bags that kids get at birthday parties (mind you, I loathe those but that is a rant for another time, I merely now accept them as part of the currency of hosting a kid's party).  He then suggested what if the goody bag was filled with things for aging adults and then we went back and forth with suggestions.  Mini bottles of alcohol? Dental floss?  Bags of medicated wipes for hemorrhoids?  Fiber tablets?   It went on and then our idea was born.  A kid's party!  But for adults!

So yes at my house.  Goody bags for kids and adults, pizza, juice boxes, alcohol, cake, ice cream, and held at the very kid friendly times of 4-7pm since most of the guests have kids.

I wanted to bang it up a notch so I looked up face painters.  I figured there would be a ton of them who wouldn't mind coming over for an hour and painting the kid's faces for $100 or so.  But they are pretty elusive.  What I got instead was a bunch of actual clowns going through an organization willing to do it for $250+ for 90 minutes tops. 

I was tempted but then no... I may be pushing 40 and apparently senile but I am not crazy!

But there are some fall festivals coming up before my birthday and there might be some face painters there I can schmooze....

Or I can maybe strike a deal with this guy, who we nicknamed "Boozy the Clown" that was at a festival we went to this past weekend.

Shilling for Cash!

Guess who won $50 trying to be all creative with Uncrustables frozen peanut butter sandwiches?  That would be me at "First Place winner #8" - second from last).  Personally, I thought mine kicked the grand prize winner's butt, but I guess Smuckers disagreed.  Oh well, I am happy with my $50!

http://www.blogher.com/check-out-winner-entries-get-creative-smuckers-uncrustables-contest

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Getting a Job...

So you know how I have been bemoaning the fact that I haven't gotten a job yet, barely getting any interviews and the one job I had a great shot at dried up because they are a start up and decided they wanted an actual software coder months after they interviewed me?  Well, it turns out I have been screwing myself silly (and not even enjoying it).

A little over a week ago I went to a lecture at the nearby career center.  In order to keep getting my unemployment benefits, I am required to do at least 3 job search activities per week and going to the career center counts.  It was put on by Harvard U and it was actually very interesting and beneficial but one thing I learned was that I need to have a computer skills section in the front of my resume where I spell out each and every software package, computing language and tool I know how to use plus what environments I am experienced in (such as Agile Scrum for those in the know).

Well I didn't have this.  The reason I didn't have this is the fancy pants career transition group that my former employer set us up with told me not to do it.  If I was a developer sure, but "employers looking for a project manager will know you know all the right tools" and honestly, I believed them because I have never really had to look for a job and this was the 3rd draft of a resume I ever wrote.

So the lecturer went over how if the word "excel" isn't spelled out and one of the requirements for the job is excel, bye bye resume.  It makes sense since there are a ton of people looking for work and only so many positions so recruiters are basically just trying to find any reason to make their stack of resumes for serious consideration smaller.

I then updated my resume, using all sorts of keywords I had found reading the numerous job postings I had, and reposted my resume to all the major job boards only to find that when I originally posted my resume back in July when I started to look, I had marked my resume private, meaning no one could find me and I wouldn't turn up in employer searches. 

Clearly I need to remove "attention to detail" from my resume.

A few hours after I clicked submit, I started getting some calls and even had a few phone screens and one in person interview already.  I also discovered that this is not really what I want to do anymore.

You know that phrase "everything happens for a reason?"  I hate that phrase with a seething passion usually reserved for child pornographers or that MTV show "The Hills."  I hated every time it was uttered to me by some well meaning person in response to the bad things happening in my life, like LM's whole first year of developmental delay and misdiagnoses, and my miscarriages, or when I lost my baby to Trisomy 18.  It wasn't as bad as "God only gives you as much as you can handle" but it was up there in my book.

Ironically, I sort of think that my idiocy happened for a reason.  It gave me more time to be a stay at home mother and spend more time with my kids.  It helped me find the right school for LM and pick him up at 3pm so now he is so happy and having one great day after another, and we haven't even tried the meds yet to see if he may truly have ADHD.  It has helped me spend more time with baby A who I feel so much more bonded to than when LM was her age.

To go back to work full time would mean that I might see her awake half an hour a day from Monday thru Friday.  She pretty much crashes around 6:30pm most nights and between commuting and pickup from daycare, I don't think I'd get home before 6pm with her.  New jobs usually aren't so flexible, they wouldn't allow me to work from home a couple of days a week, like when LM was a baby.  They wouldn't likely allow me to only be in the office 7 hours and work an additional hour after the kids were asleep, like my last company.

So, on the news that B is going to be hired on a perm member of his company (with health benefits hooray!), I decided it would be better for me to focus my search on a part time job.  I am targeting universities and hospitals so far because Boston is lousy with them but the pickings for office jobs are slim.  I will keep at it though because it is a worthy goal for me.

Yes, this will mean our ability to buy a house will be pushed off for a couple of years and I expect to loose some respect from some friends and family over that but we like where we live now and I guess if people are going to judge us poorly for renting well, then everything might happen for a reason and I might stick my tongue out at them.  They can handle it, God gave them that ability.