Daily Kvetch

Three Day Weekend!

I cannot wait to not work tomorrow! I just love a good old fashioned holiday 3 day weekend but I wish the weather was going to be better.  I really wanted to drive an hour and take LM to the zoo in Providence, RI tomorrow but apparently there are to be scattered thunderstorms which make me a tad bit uneasy about walking around the zoo with my son sitting occasionally in a stroller with metal sides. 

I had a lot of great ideas too about day trips to the beach and just getting out and doing things but hey, thunderstorms expected every single day of the 3 day weekend.  Thanks a lot Al Gore for messing with the environment so that we get bad weather.

(Oh we love Al and we drive a Prius for god sake but we also love falsely blaming him for anything environment/weather related that we don't like)

I do also want to take this opportunity to thank all you wonderful friends in real life and in the Internets who sent me your well wishes, emails, and comments on my successful nuchal scan.  Your support really does mean a lot to me!

In other news, I am having problems with insomnia and my lower back.  I thought crap like this waits for the 3rd trimester but nooooo!  I fall asleep by 11pm and around 2-3am I wake up and lie there for about 2-3 hours before falling asleep for maybe an hour before LM wakes up and makes it impossible to keep sleeping.  I called the doctor today and he suggested Benedryl so I will be getting me some o' that for tonight.

The back thing just sucks.  I have tried ice, yoga, stretches, etc but still it aches and occasionally twinges painfully.  I can't bend over easily without pain.  I am reminded that there is nothing like back pain to remind me how I take it for granted.

All of this has added up to my not exercising so much because between the exhaustion and the back pain I get in a spiral because they make me not want to exercise when clearly it is what I need most.  Today I looked through my rather sizable exercise DVD collection and I found one called "fit mama prenatal workout" collecting dust and popped it in and was embarrassed at how much I sweat and grunted trying to keep up with the instructor who looked like she was about to give birth after the cool down.

You know what amazes me is that I work out a lot, ok not for like the last month, but before that I was averaging 5-6 days a week and doing lots of pretty challenging stuff yet if I take a few days or a week off, it is like I am one of those really out of shape obese 50 year olds who show up to the gym for their initial meeting with a trainer wearing a leotard and tights and unable to touch their toes.  I mean, what gives body?

Any who...part of our weekend is going to visit my parents because then B and I can foist LM off on them and see the new Batman movies.  Priorities don't you know.  I mean, what else are we going to do with all these thunderstorms?

Have a great weekend ya'll!

One Hurdle Down

Heart beating, nuchal fold measuring normal, no signs of chromosomal abnormality detected.

I figured you'd want to read that first before I tell you about how I didn't sleep at all last night and then had to drive to a new ultrasound place (since I have a new OBGYN since my Trisomy 18 pregnancy) and how I kind of got a little lost but was on time and worried that B would get lost too but he was sitting in the waiting room when I got in.

When it was our turn and the perky tech introduced herself I launched into my whole story to let her know that I would need information and if she couldn't tell me bad results, well then she would need to get the specialist in because I wasn't going to leave the room until I knew something...anything.

I was actually a lot nicer and calmer and not as aggressive as you might imagine and the tech was excellent and understanding and told me right away, upon viewing the profile of the fetus that she could already see a normal nuchal fold.  She told me she had to take repetitive measurements of all sorts of things so not to worry and then at the end said, "I'm not worried about this baby at all."

She may have been hugged by a half naked woman dripping in that gel they use to do ultrasounds.  There could have been some awkwardness.  It is hard to tell.

B has informed me that I am now due to the "groping of my life" since I have been less than forthcoming in the physical affection area for a while.  I informed him that there may be some vomiting.  His answer? "A few weeks ago that might have given me some pause, but not so much now."

One of those Days

Did you ever get one of those painful pimples right where your nose skin meets your face skin?  A painful swollen red area with a very clear whitehead that is almost impossible to get rid of? 

Have you ever woken up with one on each side of your nose?

Said B upon looking at my face this morning, "Oh honey, I'm so sorry!"

Adult acne - the scourge of the genes my mother's side.  That an obesity.  Thanks mom.

Another Reason for a New Job

I think I have been mostly unhappy in my job going on for maybe a year now.  Oh there are some great parts to it, like the flexibility and the ability to work from home when I need to or show up at the office at 10am and then take off for the day at 5pm.  Plus, I like a lot of the people and I have learned a lot.

But mostly, I haven't enjoyed it and have been taking a "wait and see" attitude.  Maybe I can get laid off and get a nice severance?  Maybe this baby will actually stick and I should stay for the FMLA benefits?  Well, I do like the people and seem to have a lot of friends there?

So today we had a game party and none of my work friends showed up.  Our previous game parties were 90% work folks so you can imagine this was a noted change.

Luckily, some other very cool friends of ours came and also a bunch of people B has met through this game meet-up group so our place was hopping and people stayed and seemed to have a good time.  Plus, I got to spend some quality time with my friends who did show up.

I wouldn't be so annoyed if I knew the score.  I haven't received any signals from my work friends that they don't want to hang out with me.  I haven't intuited a "you were kind of fun at first but now, well, why waste a Saturday afternoon with you?" vibe.

Worse yet, we had moved the party from its original May date to accommodate several of these people, many of who verbally had told me they were coming.  But then, about 2 weeks ago, some odd excuses started coming through.

One guy, who I had worked with in California and who got a cool $3k for getting me a job at his company, had told me he and his wife and son would be at the party.  They have come to every event we have had and seemed to have a good time.  I even saw a movie with his wife a few weeks back and we chatted happily after the movie over coffee.  About 2 weeks ago, he sends me an email asking if I have any recommendations for camp grounds that would be good for kids.  Then, he asks to borrow our tent.  I ask him when he needs it since we are going camping in late July and he says "well, we need it the weekend of your party.  It is kind of a belated father's day thing."  So, you don't have a reservation or a tent for camping but you picked that weekend to go and to borrow the tent of the people you are blowing off?  Classy!

But I like them and I don't think they are being dicks on purpose so I have decided not to tell them how I feel about this.

Another woman tells me she had forgotten the date and had convinced her husband to do a romantic day trip to a local town and that she needs to go because "he hadn't wanted to go and she had sort of talked him into it."  Ok, so she rather take her husband somewhere he doesn't want to go than come hang with us, ok....

Yet another couple say they will stop by around 5pm but then say they have a kid's birthday party to go to so they can't make it. I suppose it might be a coincidence that LM went to their daughter's birthday party last weekend, had a blast, but then later that evening got a high fever and was sick.  A trip to the pediatrician revealed he had a virus that he clearly contracted 2-3 days ago at daycare and that meant we had just exposed his daughter and his party guests to a 24 hour bug.  When I told him about it the next day, I could see him mentally crossing us off any future invites to parties.

Finally, there were just the no shows.

I am not the sharpest knife in the drawer but me thinks something stinks and it is likely me.  I guess it is time to find a new job and make some new work friends and hopefully I won't turn them sour like this lot.

Or I guess it could be a coincidence? 

In other news, loads of red spotting in the past 24 hours.  I no longer have the ability to think positively about my last pregnancy ever but have to wait till Tuesday for my nuchal scan where I bet money they say there is no heartbeat.  Anyone want to take the bet?

As Seen in the Elevator

I like to think of myself as a nice person but the sad truth is that I can be a judgmental snark.  Don't believe me?  Oh you will!  Witness this.....

I work in an office building with 12 floors of offices devoted entirely to high tech companies, or so I thought.  This morning, as I walked from the parking garage and into the lobby of my building, I spotted a woman who stood out in the crowd.  As we waited for the elevator I scanned the listing of companies in my building to see if I could spot which one might be a front for an escort service.  Whoever named the company in question did a good job because I couldn't detect which one really hired out ladies of the evening instead of making software.

It wasn't so much that her dress was tight, low cut, and bright red.  It was the shoes.  They were high heels with long ties that wrapped up her legs like ballet shoes or old Grecian style, sort of like a gladiator, or Whorish Maximus.

This is where I surreptitiously took a picture of her from behind with my camera phone while pretending to check my nonexistent text messages.  Classy huh?  (me taking the picture that is, but I guess the same could apply to the outfit at hand).

Now don't let me fool you, I am usually no prude but my own fashion can best be described as "frumpy" but in an office of tech workers where at most the women wear cute sun dresses or sweater sets, the lady in red with the bondage lite shoes really stood out.

As I left the office, 8 hours later, I saw her smoking outside the lobby.  The shoe laces had fallen around her ankles and she looked the worse for wear.

Something tells me she doesn't have a desk job.

Let's Talk about Sex (and the City - the movie!)

I will take a moment to stop boring you with the minute details of my life to talk a little pop culture, specifically the movie Sex and the City.  Have you seen it?  If not, then this post is spoilerific and I apologize but you have been warned.

 

I had wanted to see this movie because I enjoyed the TV series and also, hello chick flick!  I got a chance to see it with a bonafide new female friend rather than see it alone or drag B to it and I think this is definitely a movie to see with another woman unless your dude was into the series and didn’t find it annoying and full of women he would never want to meet like a certain man I am married to would say.  I can only imagine the stuff B would have whispered into my ear if I had seen it with him so I am glad I did not.

 

Also, I was intrigued because I work with a woman in the UK who I have never met in person and she had told me the week before I saw the movie that it had changed her life.  She said I needed to see it before she would explain more.

 

Once I did, this is what she emailed to me.  I think it is interesting to note that she is single and in her early 30s whereas I am married with child in my late 30s.

 

 

Here’s what I think the film was saying:

 

1- women are often if not always the reason why the guy strays / cheats / leaves in the first place

e.g.

Miranda was too busy working to satisfy Steve so he strays (its not all her fault!) Miranda caused Big to get cold feet

Carrie wants a big wedding and Big thinks she's a changed person (that one baffled me - I mean they were together for 10 years!)

2- women will always take back the guy regardless of what he did in the past

e.g.

Carrie taking Big back after standing her up at the alter...knowing Vogue had published like a 10-page spread. How selfish.

Miranda & Steve (does he even have a JOB?)

3- independent, successful-driven women who value building their lives will die alone, whereas women with ambition to find a man & have babies (& nothing else) will get everything.

e.g.

Samantha v's

Charlotte

. Yeah we can all marry a wealthy troll, but as soon as Samantha decided not to live her life through Smith, she found herself half a decade old, and single. I know it was her decision, but why couldn't Smith have insisted he give up his career in LA & move to NY with her??!

I just felt like the whole film was a little uncomfortable and suffocating in that I'm about the age the girls were when they filmed the series. Back then they had fun, wanted things...and 10-15 years later & they have nothing, or have had to give up everything they wanted to be with a guy.
Its just a little sad really, and at the time it did make me think – shall I just forget about enjoying life & turn into a Charlotte now?!

 

On a plus note, the unity of friends is a great thing...and Samantha's

wardrobe & everything about her was fab. Carrie was a little whiny & drab for me...and she's usually my favourite.

Here is my emailed response to her:

You know, it is so funny because I came away from the movie without any of the perspective you had - which I like by the way, because I like to get different perspectives on things.

As for women being the reason why the guy strays/cheats/ etc - I didn't really get that.  I am not letting Steve off the hook but I think he cheated because he was needy and weak and couldn't deal with the realities of life with Miranda juggling work and motherhood.  He knew he did wrong and he really wanted to "fix" it but I also think that Miranda was wrong in the way she dealt with him - sure she was angry and betrayed and who wouldn't be but to refuse to talk with him about if for months and all but cut him out of her life?  I mean, if you have a child together, you need to at least try to talk after an obvious cooling off period.

He has a job, or at least he did in the series, he owned a bar called Scout - co -owned it with Carrie's ex Aiden.

I got the sense that Big was overwhelmed with the wedding - he was embarrassed to be getting married for the 3rd time so publicly.  I liked how he immediately knew he was being stupid after freaking out and tried to explain it to Carrie but she was too far gone to listen to her.  I think that was all his fault in this breakup and he actually knew that and kept trying to contact her.

Women will always take back the guy - I can sort of see this from the movie, but I kind of understand it.  With Miranda and Steve they have a child together and an almost 10 year history together.  She didn't take him back easily and I thought it was good they were in couple's counseling but at some point I guess, it is better to be with the person and full communication and forgiveness than without them.

I think Carrie took Big back because she loved him and he had been trying to prove himself to her - and like she said, they were happiest together before trying to live happily ever after.  She missed the happiness and realized she didn't need to be married.

Independent, successful-driven women who value building their lives will die alone, whereas women with ambition to find a man & have babies (& nothing else) will get everything.

This is interesting because when the show was first on I used to watch it with a different eye than I use to watch it now.  They show reruns of the show constantly on a local channel and I am always wondering how all these women are so obsessed with men and relationships - all of them.  But, then I realized that I have been with my husband all through my late 20s and 30s (I am 38 now) so I don't have that perspective of the single woman looking for love.

I thought the movie was actually better than the series in that regards because it focused a lot more on friendship and being there for each other.  I think Samantha would still decide against Smith even if he did quit and move to NYC, she just didn't like "relationship Samantha" - she liked herself so much more as the single woman.

I also think Charlotte truly loves Harry.  In the series she starts out thinking he is ugly but they he grows on her and is a lot better to her than all the other good looking guys she dated and she seemed actually truly happy.  Also, she is the only one who doesn't work out of the home.

 

Miranda, Carrie, and Samantha are all successful in their jobs and love their careers, which is great and I think they all made choices in their relationships.  Samantha chose not to have one when she could have stayed with Smith easily, Miranda chose to move forward with Steve because she loves him and has a history/child with him, and Carrie chose to get back with Big because she is happier with him than without - but all 3 still have careers.

In the series, I never identified with any of them really but I guess in the movie, I can see Miranda more because being with someone for 10+ years and having a kid and juggling work and parenthood and wifehood - it is not easy in the least.  But I wouldn't trade it for anything (well, I'd give up the job if I could win the lottery :-))

Oh well, I guess I just think that in some ways the movie is oddly realistic in that relationships take work, sometimes things don't go as planned, but in the end we chose to be with the people we want to be with for different reasons.

So I ask you dear reader, what did you think of the movie and how do you think your life and experiences altered your perspective?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Updated: Everything Must Go!

I don't know what you do when you and your spouse take 2 days off from work at the same time.  Maybe you go somewhere relaxing and sip cocktails by the side of the pool.  If so, I am insanely jealous because B and I spent the time cleaning out the basement and attic, throwing away a ton of crap, and putting the rest into the "for sale" pile.  Then we put up signs all over the place telling people in cars to come by Saturday at 8am and buy! Buy! Buy!

Our goal has been to get rid of it all so I plan to mark things at rock bottom prices hoping the little old ladies won't try to haggle me down from 50 cents to a quarter, although I know they will.  I just hope I can recoup the cost of the babysitter because that is $50 right there for LM's teacher to spend the morning with him so B and I can haggle with old ladies.

A lot of this stuff we moved cross country because we had very little time between selling the house to when the cross country movers came, not enough time to go through everything and weed.  Yes, we literally moved boxes of stuff we no longer wanted cross country.

I am impressed with what we did though, we halved everything stored in the basement and attic.  We also filled the trash barrels so that our downstairs neighbor will not be pleased.  We also thoroughly cleaned the bottom rooms of our apartment so much so that when we got LM home today he just stared around in amazement and said, "It is so clean!"

It would be really nice to now get another couple of days off and go to the beach but alas, we cannot.  So there is our sumer vacation folks, spent in a moldy dusty basement.

In other news, B and I celebrated 7 years of marital bliss and hit a fancy Cambodian restaurant nearby while LM was at home with his sitter/teacher.  B and I had been to Cambodia before, unlike I bet anyone who works in the restaurant, but the food was excellent and it was nice to go out for a fancy meal.  I reminded B that the meal we ate at the restaurant for $100 we would have paid $10 for in Cambodia but alas, I have never been so physically uncomfortable making my own sweaty gravy as I as in the humidity that was the "cool season" when we were there.

And for those keeping track, I am still pregnant.  My heart palpitations have really lessened but I also wonder if I am now just used to them.

Hey, anyone want to come over to our place super early tomorrow and buy a bunch of crap?  No?  Wish us well!

Updated!  We had set the alarm for 6am as the babysitter was to come over at 7am leaving us an hour to get everything out of the basement and onto tables in the driveway and garage.  I had a restless night's sleep dreaming uneasily of tagging items with prices so when the alarm went off I kind of felt like crap.  But it was sale day!

How early do you think people come to a sale that in its ad and signs says starts at 8am?  If you guessed 7:15am you'd be correct.  I was pulling out items and trying to put them in place as 2 ladies rifled through unpacked boxes.  One of them was the biggest sale of the day - $10.  By 10am we had sold 3/4 of the stuff.  I had priced things very low - including a box of junk I put a sign on that said "Everything in this box 5 cents and a "Free box" with things anyone could take at no cost.  Still, they haggled.

This one woman pissed me off especially.  I had finally gotten rid of my skinny clothes - 2 huge bins of size 12-14 which yes, is skinny for me.  They were nice things too - all marked 50 cents per item.  She wanted 12 pieces and when I said $6 she smiled and said "how about $5" well fine but then she gave me a roll of quarters that she rolled in some magazine paper.  I gave her change in quarters.  She went on to buy another $5 worth of items but insisted to pay me $3.  Our goal was to get rid of stuff so I just took it but man, lady!

We were selling books for 25 cents a piece.  An old guy took 3 hardcover books and when I said 75 cents he looked at me with a smile and said "come on....50 cents!"  Some of these people I felt like picking up, turning upside down and shaking change out of their pockets.

At the end of the day, we made $80 with a $20 profit if you deduct the cost of the sitter and the money spent to buy big sign boards and markers and tape to put up the signs.  More importantly, we whittled down our unwanted junk from about 14 boxes of stuff to 4.  Those go to Goodwill tomorrow.

Operation reduce junk a raging success!  Now, we just need to focus on not bringing more junk into the house!

Checking In

So apparently it isn't good form to be writing about heart palpitations and an early pregnancy and then drop off the blog radar for a week.  I got no fewer than 3 email/instant message contacts from worried friends today and I am very honored that I inspired such care.

I am sorry I was remiss in blogging but last week was a blur of appointments (doctor, car, LM's social worker, visiting new schools) and trying to work at my crazy busy and annoying job.  I hardly noticed the time had passed.

So before I continue I will fill you in on the basics:

• Still pregnant (9w4d today)
• Heart still palpitating albeit a lot less than before but cardiologist appointment is not till August

I had my OBGYN appointment today in fact.  I have a new OBGYN since I decided to move from the women's care center that dealt with my last pregnancy and just use the one in the same foundation that all my other doctors are through so they can access all my records Willy nilly.  I will still deliver in the same hospital as before but I have all new OBGYN and nursing staff to get to know. 

I have to say, I love my new OBGYN.  He is this openly gay man who uses terms like, "Wow isn't your case file a page turner - you are more interesting than a beach novel" and, after I described myself as "not a typical earth mother who thinks everything will work out peachy keen" he replied, "Good, I am so sick of those ladies!"  At the same time, he tells like it is and I appreciate that.

Did you know this is my last pregnancy?  Not only did B and I agree to this but apparently being 38, having fibroids, a mystery heart condition, being overweight, and having a benign liver tumor that can grow and potentially burst with hormones makes me one to monitor closely.  I am, as they say, a high risk pregnancy.

Even so, aside from the more than usual frequent scans I will have, his advice to me was to eat when I feel hungry and stop when I am not and to listen to my body and honor what it is saying.  Speaking of scans, my nuchal is set for July 1, wish me luck!  Although I don't necessarily believe him, he seems to think that if I can get past a successful scan I will start to relax and be more positive about this pregnancy.

As for the heart stuff, the palpitations seem to be less or I am just getting used to them.  My doctor wants me to see a cardiologist just to be safe but the earliest appointment is in August so there ya go.

In other news, we finally got to see the social worker about LM's bad behavior in school.  Ironically, for the week before we saw the doctor we got nothing but glowing reports from school.  Still, I am glad we saw him because he had a lot of good advice about discipline and reward and gave us some insight about development in general.  LM, of course, was great at the visit.  Sat and talked to the doctor and played toys with him.  The long and the short of it is that he gave me a letter to give to the teachers to have them do a survey online and then he would see B and I sans LM in 2 weeks.

Speaking of LM, he is so funny lately.  He is really into costumes although we don't have many.  He puts on some slippers his grandmother sent him, wedges the Mr. Potato glasses onto his nose, waves around his magic wand we got at a fair and dances.  He says it is his "acrobat costume" and it is best when his pants are too big exposing a large view of plumbers crack.

I came out to my parents this weekend when we met at a halfway point restaurant for Father's Day.  I think they are nervous but thrilled.  Either way it buys me a little more slack for not calling her that often during the work week.

My other hours this week were spent reading Book 5 of the Harry Potter series.  I had written earlier that I was slowly moving through the series but liked it rather than loved it.  Well that was until I hit Book 4 - now I am obsessed, so much so I insisted we shop at the super S+S for groceries last night because they sell books too and I needed to start Book 6 ASAP!  Never mind that the prices for food are astronomical at this place.

So that is what I am up too, exciting I know!

Greetings from Hades

Remember Spike Lee's movie Do the Right Thing where it was so hot and humid that people went crazy and bad things happened?  Well, we are on day four of 95 degree heat with all the humidity fixins and I can't promise I won't throw a garbage can through a plate glass window.

On Not Sleeping

4am.  LM calls out to me from his gate, "Mommy there is an ant hill in my room, come and see!"
LM is obsessed with insects, specifically ants, caterpillars, lady bugs, and butterflies.  There was no ant hill in his room but that didn't keep anyone from being able to go back to sleep. The bedrooms have nice air conditioners so the heat did not wake him up.

On More Potty Training Woes

Overheard the other day:
B:  LM, where did this liquid all over the floor come from?  Did you knock over a glass of water?
LM:  No daddy, it's PeePee!
(it was a wood floor so hard to spot the yellow tinge)

On Proper Motivation at Work

The managers at my company were sent "motivational" postcards to pass out to their employees.  On one side was a picture of say a jewel that had a caption "You're a Jewel!" or a flower with the caption "thanks!" or a crown with the caption "Wow!"  On the other side were all sorts of check boxes for the manager to check off values the person showed, like excellence, teamwork, innovation, and customer fixation.  There was another section with check boxes for behaviors.  There was a space for the manager to free text other things s/he might want to highlight.

Now I don't know about you but I will not be motivated, flattered, or more productive receiving a postcard with some crap checked off and a few comments.  I imagine if I got one "for realz" I would vacillate between ripping it up or showing it to all my friends with a "can you believe this crap?" attitude.

The managers felt pretty much the same way.  Mine made a house of cards with them in his office before offering them to parents to take home for the kids to draw on.  I took a bunch and started writing my own things on them and leaving them on co-workers desks when they weren't around.  Here is a sampling of what I "rewarded" them for:

For not going on a stress induced killing spree
For restraining yourself from screaming at the customer during a conference call
For smiling politely at people who ask stupid questions instead of backhanding them into next week
For staying sober at a job that would turn most people into alcoholics
For curbing your homicidal rage
For sharing chips with me at lunch
For being a self proclaimed "cranky ass bitch"

See, that is a card I would keep!

On Health

Still pregnant, still heart palpitating.  Have followup appointment Wednesday in hopes that the holtor monitor results are in.  Think need cardiologist.

Still kicked ass (literally) in Krav Maga.

The Biggest Party Foul

Sometimes in life you have to make a snap decision, there is no time to mull over the options and weigh the consequences, you just have to go with it and hope it works out for the best.

Thursday night was such a night.  Let's just say, I got lucky.

B had a work social to attend that evening and knowing I would be a solo parent, I decided to take LM to the town library.  It is one of the nicest libraries I have ever been into as it has a fully stocked kids playroom and also a small cafe that is open until 7pm for dinner.  It would be a great opportunity to play with LM without the limitation of it being just us at home where I might have to bother my addled mind for things to do to keep him entertained until bath and bed.

We have been toilet training LM and it has not been an easy process but we have buckled down during the day and sent him to school in a variety of cartoon themed underwear and most days we get it, and his pants, back soaked in a bag and LM is wearing his spare clothes.  However, this night he was in his original clothes so things were looking up.

It was even more promising when we first arrived and I told him that before we got dinner or went into the play room, I had to go the bathroom and he had to come with me.  As soon as we entered the ladies room he picked himself a stall and urinated into the toilet.  I was so happy I cheered and clapped, which you know, he did for me when it was my turn.  He also offered me a sticker.  "Good peeing Mama!"

We had a lovely time eating dinner and playing and looking at books.  At one point I was across the room sitting on a couch reading a magazine when LM called across the room that he had to go poopy.  I sprung to action but then noticed that he was clutching the back of his pants and as I got closer I could smell that it had already happened.  Worse yet, I noticed a distinctive poop nugget on the carpet right next to a pile of stuffed animals.

Do I pick it up with my bare hands?  Do I rush LM to the bathroom first and then deal with the nugget?  There were no other kids around so I made a decision, the nugget would have to wait.

I ushered LM, still cluthcing his backside and saying "poopy!" to the bathroom but we have to pass by the main desk in the library where about 10 people were milling to check out books. That is when I noticed yet another nuggets had fallen out of his pants and onto his floor in this very public space.  We moved on.

In the bathroom, I got everything I could into the toilet and cleaned LM to the best of my ability and then grabbed a huge wad of toilet paper.  It was nugget hunting time.

Unfortunately, LM knows that the routine is that paper goes in the trash near the bathroom door and scolded me to throw it away but I told him I needed to pick up the poop nuggets.  Therefore, it was no surprise that 20 seconds later, in front of about 10 people, LM runs to the nugget at their feet, points to it and yells "Mama, my poop nugget!"  I scooped it up in paper without making eye contact and tossed it in the trash.  It was time to find the elusive second poop nugget.

Last we left it, it was next to a pile of stuffed animals and no kids were in the playroom.  Now there were like 5, all playing with stuffed animals.  Luckily, the nugget looked un-stepped on so I sidled up to it and scooped it up while LM chanted, "poop nugget, poop nugget."

I threw it in a nearby trashcan and told LM it was time to go.  "But why Mama?" he asked.  I told him when you poop on the floor and are sitting in poop stained underwear the party is over, it is time to go home and have a bath.  He resisted and wanted to get some books so he grabbed two and we had to do the walk of shame to the front desk and take out books in front of people who knew we had just pooped on the floor.

So it worked out well, we weren't banned from the library, and no one stepped on the poop or touched it.  I didn't have to second guess my decision of whether to pick up poop with my bare hands. In addition, I also got to teach LM his first lesson about the party foul.  Sometimes kid, you do something and it is just time to go.